Loving Stories Isn't Running Away
For a lot of teens and adults, stories are where they feel most like themselves. Books, shows, anime, games, and fandoms can offer a break from the world they live in, whether that's tension at home, trouble at school, the political landscape, or the state of the country.
Stories can also be a place to finally see yourself represented. And when it's hard to fit in or make friends elsewhere, fandom can offer real community with people who love the same things you do. There are worlds and characters to fall in love with, and the hobbies that grow out of them, like fan art and fan fiction, are built around connection. Fandom keeps going because people keep creating things for each other.
When Escape Is Healthy
Escape gets a bad reputation, but taking time to find joy in something fun is exactly what hobbies are for. After a long week or a hard day, getting lost in a story you love can help you rest and recharge.
It's worth a closer look when escaping becomes the only thing someone does. If stories are replacing ways of coping with real life, if someone is pulling away from people and not making friends, or if it's their only hobby, that's when it might be time to pay closer attention.
For Parents
There's nothing wrong with your teen being into all of this. Caring about stories, loving characters, making art, and finding community through what they love can be a really good thing, and it can help teens get through difficult seasons of their lives. If you notice behavior that worries you, don't dismiss it. But loving stories on its own isn't something to fix, and a little curiosity about what your teen loves can go a long way.
Where Stories Show Up in Therapy
I love hearing about people's interests and the stories they care about. For many people, talking about a favorite character is easier than talking about what's actually going on. The stories someone loves often reflect something real back to them, like what they want out of life, what they're struggling with, what they hope to overcome, or who they hope to become.
That makes stories a natural place to meet. Starting with the worlds someone loves gives us common ground, and from there we can explore how that story connects to their own life.
You Don't Have to Grow Out of It
To me, being a fandom kid is a rite of passage. It's how a lot of young people express themselves and find joy, and sometimes it's what keeps them grounded. If they grow up to be fandom adults, that's okay too. Reading and loving stories as an adult is a great hobby, and there's nothing childish about it.
What matters is balance, which means having other hobbies, healthy connections, and space to be yourself and build good relationships. It also helps to come back to reality every now and then and take stock of where you're at.
I'm not here to judge you or tell you how to live your life. I love these things too, and I want to help create spaces where people can find community and be themselves. You don't have to grow out of what you love. You just get to find a version of it that keeps you connected to your life, too.